Lets Not Piss Off Dracula Today, Yeah
by ilovewolfs1234
Summary: Jen and her best friend Mitchy are walking around the Transylvanian woods, Jen decides it would a good idea to walk through a portal they found in the middle of the woods. Now the two a trapped in the past, no way to get out. And Jens sarcasm and pissed off attitude still hasn't changed, then Jen gets taken by one of the brides, let The games begin.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N this is comedy so.. it's not going to be serious.**

Chapter One

Jen grinned at her best friend Mitchy, the two girls decided to spend a day trip in Transylvania she was loving it however Mitchy, was not.

" You little SOB, get of of my clothes!"

Jen turned to look at her friend who was tangled in thorns.

She laughed as her friend struggled.

" Jen I swear if you don't get you hyper blonde ass over her I will kill you. " Jen sighed,

" Fine, just let me take a photo. Smile?eh or not."

Before snapping the picture Jen helped her friend out of the brambles.

"Where exactly are we?" Mitchy asked her. Flipping her brown hair over her shoulder, witch was now leaves.

" I don't know, but I'm sure we are fine,"

Jen waved her friend forward.

The two friends walked around the beautiful woods a little while longer.

The came across a patch of woods that seemed to shimmer, and it looked like water in the mid air.

Jen went to touch it, but Mitchy slapped her hand away.

" Ow. What was that for?" Jen said rubbing her hand.

" Don't touch it. It could be dangerous."

Jen smiled and laughed.

" Whats the worst it could do, eat me?"

Jen reached out her hand it went through the water like substance.

"This is just weird," Jen said. " Okay I'm going to walk through it. If I don't come out, you come in? Alright? you'll probably have to save me."

Not waiting to hear Mitchy's protests Jen walked through. As she walked through she was greeted with a blast of cold air.

"Burr."

It seemed to be the same woods the walked through only colder. Things just seemed older.

Soon she saw Mitchy's hand come through the portal type thing.

" Oh, hey it's cold." Mitchy dug through her backpack looking for the Two's jacket.

She tossed Jen her black one and Mitchy put on her Jean jacket.

Jen was grateful for the warmth, because shortly after snow started falling down.

" Were are we?" Mitchy asked.

" Transylvania. Go back a couple of centuries." Jen told Mitchy as they arrived to an ancient looking town, torches lit the streets, horses pulled wagons, and the people walked around in old ragged clothing.

"Maybe a renaissance fair?" Mitchy suggested.

Jen rolled her eyes.

" I don't think so."


	2. Chapter 2

Jen looked around, her face curled into a snarl, people kept looking and gawking like she was a circus freak.

Which the blonde didn't take to kindly too.

" What are looking at you mangy-" She was cut off by Mitchy clamping a hand over her mouth.

a woman with dark brown curls walked up in front of them.

" Take off your hoods let us see your faces, we don't trust strangers." Jen didn't know if she was to them or them men beside them.

One of the two men spoke up.

" I'm here to help."

"I don't need help." The man pulled out the crossbow hanging from his back. For a minute I thought he was going to shot the woman, she ducked.

The man shot at these female vampire bat, creatures.

It had no effect.

The vampire with the red hair lunged for Jen. Jennifer took off like a bullet. She knew she couldn't put run them. But why just stand there and die?

Mitchy had run into a house along with the brunette. Jennifer hopped she was alright.

Soon Jennifer was pushed to the ground. She spat out sort and was soon lifted into the air by her feet.

" Do like to Fly?!" The .

" Not with a crazy bee-otch like you!" Jennifer screamed.

The red head let her drop, about fifty feet before grabbing her again.

" I want you to shut up." She screeched.

"And people in hell want ice water but you don't see them getting any do you?!"

The redhead hissed at Jennifer.

" I will drop you and not catch you again you pitiful human."

Jen shut up, she had no doubt in her mind that the vampire would drop her.

################

Mitchy had just helped fend off the two vampires with her new found friend Anna. Verona, got away but Van Helsing killed Marishka with the holy water.

" Where's Jennifer?" She asked.

It's been Thirty minutes since she had last seen her friend.

" The blonde haired smart mouth?" Asked Anna.

" Yes. I can't find her. Did you see her?"

"Aleera. She had her."


	3. Chapter 3

Jen was sitting staring down a vampire.

" No."

"Yes."

" Nuhuh."

"You will."

"NOT going to happen."

" Yes it will."

"Make me."

The red headed vampire screeched " Damn you!"

The blond simply arched a brow.

" I'm good thanks."

" You will get out there. And you will wear the God forsaken dress."

Jennifer crossed her arms.

" Make. Me."

With an angry squawk the she-vampire lifted her up by the bicep.

She went limp.

The vampire almost fell over, Jennifer became a dead weight to the vampire.

The red head was trying to dress her like an oversized rag doll.

Failing miserably, if she may add.

" I can do this allll day bitch."

The red head simply dropped her.

"FINE!"

She turned into a grey bat creature and flew out the window.

"Dramatic,"

Jennifer kicked off what little of the dress she had on. She was completely naked rather than her panties.

She was not phased.

She began to wander the room it was quite chilly. Her blond curls fell over her shoulders as she bent down to pick up the dress.

" ew..."

She muttered as she looked it over. It was a rather hideous shade of gold and had a corset.

" No way in hell."

She flung the dress over her shoulder and onto the floor.

Soon her door was flung open.

" Ever heard of knocking?"

A man with dark hair stood in her doorway. She didn't get to study his features for too long because he flung a hand over his face.

" Why are you nude?"

" Because I want to be." She began, she soon laughed. " Why does it bother you?"

" It might. Why are you not in the dress I sent up?"

Jen scoffed.

" So you are the idiot with no fashion sense. That thing is hideous. "

Mitchy was currently sitting in the home of Anna V-something. She felt bad but she couldn't remember the woman's last name to save her life. She wasn't about to ask it either.

Anna was pointing out on a map.

" We believe the castle could be located here. But we have been searching for generations."

Mitchy followed her finger.

" Generations?"

" Yes. We have yet to find it. I hate to say this, but your friend might be lost for good."


	4. Chapter 4

Jen kicked her heels on a desk. She was still parading around the halls with out any clothes. Except her underwear of course.

She refused until some decent ones would be brought to her. The man with dark hair would round the hall and quickly throw his hand over his face. In all fairness she was only doing it because it flustered the shit out of him.

So yes. She was (almost) naked in a castle of vampires, and no fucks were given.

A knock on her door, she walked over to the door. She pulled it wide open.

It was the dark haired man. He had his eyes sealed shut and he held out a pile of clothing.

"Here. Please. Take it."

She smiled. She wanted to mess with the poor guy some.

She got up on her tiptoes and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Thanks sugar."

She shut the door before she started cackling like mad.

Jen almost died from laughter.

Once she caught her breath she took a look at the clothes. A pair of pants, socks, a puffy red shirt and what looked like a pile of bandages.

Jen slipped on the pants, they fit a little loose but they were fine. She figured that the bandages could be used as a bra. So she wrapped them tightly around her chest and slipped on the shirt.

Not bad.

Once she finished putting on the socks she went out into the halls.

Sliding down in the halls of a giant castle was fucking awesome.

Jennifer would take of running and would slide to a stop till she fell over in a giggling heap.

She noticed the two female vampires watched her with mixed emotions.

Jennifer shot them a smile.

The dark haired vampire she hadn't seen yet smiled back and chatted with the red head as she watched.

When Jen had composed her self the dark haired vampire walked over to her.

"May I ask what on, earth are you doing?"

Jennifer pushed back her hair.

"What do you mean, have you never done this?"

The dark haired woman shook her head no.

" Well we will have to fix that."

Two pairs of socks and an hour later Jen learned that the red head vampire wasn't such a bitch after all and the dark haired woman was a hoot and a half.

She learned that the red head was Aleera and just was very easily angered.

She also learned that the brunette was Verona, also known as the queen of awesome.

Verona was great at inappropriate jokes, sass, and sliding in socks.

The three women where in Jennifer's bedroom laughing over their differences.

Mitchy and Anna were slowly mapping out a plan to find Jennifer. She would kill any vampire that stood in her way.


End file.
